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working moms

From One Mother to Another

I am not an expert.  I am semi-good at so many things, but not an expert on anything.  I am a pretty good cook, I can run like the wind (or maybe a light gust), I’m the okayest singer ever, a moderately talented artist, my jokes crack me up but most would say they need some work, I am a food connoisseur (AKA aw lawk to eat a lawt), an amateur yogi, a wannabe master crafter, a sorta good cake maker, and I’d like to think I have a green thumb but it’s more of a yellowish shade. The list of averageishness (did I mention I’m a good word maker upper) goes on and on.  Yet in the midst of my mediocrity and along my journey, I’ve discovered an area of my life in which I am truly proud of and one where I excel in far more than any other. I’m referring to motherhood. I will never say I am a mediocre, average mother because I am not. I know that I am a good mom, not because I do everything right, but because I give it my everything.  Lord knows I have so many challenges and have stumbled one too many times, but that only makes me stronger. It makes me human. Motherhood is the one thing in life in which I know I cannot fail because I refuse anything less for my children. I am the mother of three beautiful boys who have inspired this blog.  I want to share my experiences, my successes as a mom as well as my challenges.  My experience as a mom has not been a long one, as my boys are still very young, which means I have a lifetime of learning to go. That’s were you come in.  I not only want to share my experiences, I also want to share yours.  I want to be inspired by YOU. There are so many women, younger and older, who have great stories to tell and beautiful words of wisdom to give; women who have been through great joys, but also unthinkable tragedies.  I will also share their experiences and hope that we can find a source of strength, determination, admiration, and respect in each other.

Motherhood has taught me so much about myself, just as I’m sure it has for you.  It changed me. It changed you. It changed us to the very core. I constantly make mistakes as a mom, but that doesn’t cause me to fail. It causes me to learn.  Mistakes are proof that we are trying. My mistakes, my challenges, and my obstacles have only made me a stronger mother. We are our own worst critics, aren’t we? The list of my pros pale in comparison to my undeniable cons. I can tell you the dozens of things wrong with me in a matter of seconds, yet slowly count on one hand the things that I believe are right. Its easy to focus on the bad, instead of the good. As Pretty Woman herself once said, “the bad stuff is easier to believe” (90’s classic!). We can be so critical of ourselves.  We’re always worrying whether we are good enough or if we are doing enough.  The truth is we are enough. The fact that we even worry about being good moms means that we already are. That’s hard to see sometimes through all of our insecurities.  Then on top of our own criticism, we face scrutiny from society and even mothers criticizing and shaming other mothers over their parenting choices. I occasionally allow some of that negativity to seep in and question my own choices. However, in the middle of all of my shortcomings and insecurities I find a strength and confidence that I attribute to God, my parents, my husband, and my three beautiful sons. They are my rock, the reason that I will never fail.  Yes, I will stumble, but I will not fail them. They are my reason to succeed.

This blog is dedicated to mothers who understand the juggle of life. Moms come from all walks of life and we are all very different, yet still so much alike.  While I do share many of my own experiences, tips, and advice, that come from raising three very remarkable boys, I also share the advice and stories of other mothers.  I hope you find their stories just as inspiring as I do and the shared advice helpful.  Keep in mind as you read these articles from myself and other moms, that this is not a place of judgement.  We rise by lifting others, so from one mother to another, lets lift each other up and share our journey and appreciate how much we are all just working like a motha’.

The Juggle is Real!

Mom.  A tiny 3 letter word that holds such an enormously profound meaning.  It is difficult to articulate the magnitude of being a mother, the depth of which can only truly be felt once you become one.  Trying to describe this life-changing emotion would be about as easy as trying to number the infinite stars above.  The responsibility for another human being is ultimate.  From one day to the next, you go from being a loner, self-centered, and having responsibilities for only yourself and perhaps a significant other, to being a multi-talented, semi-professional at everything, career juggling, superhuman.  A mother is a multitude of careers all rolled into one profession. You all of a sudden become a nurse, a counselor, a teacher, a maid, a chauffer, a chef, a negotiator, a detective, a bodyguard, a google extraordinaire….hell, if you have more than one kid you damn near become a gymnast.Multitasking housewife

These are all the unofficial titles we get that are somehow crammed into the tiniest of words: mom.  On top of this pupu platter of responsibilities comes the ever-important official title of your everyday job; the money-maker title; the one that takes away from all those other responsibilities, but the one you have to have in order to keep your family financially afloat.  How do we do it all?  How do we juggle all of these responsibilities? How do we manage all of the expectations as working moms while still raising decent human beings?

The answer is not as profound or as enlightening or as mind-blowing as one would hope.  The answer is plain and simple, although the journey is anything but that.  The answer is simply that “we just do it.” We take one day at a time. We put one foot in front of the other, and just like we teach our children, we take baby steps through the journey.

Whether you’re a working mom, a stay-at-home mom, a work-from-home mom, an adoptive mom, a foster mom, a birth mom, or an unconventional mom, we all know the struggle.  We are all cut from the same cloth.  Our stitching might be a little different, but we are all made from the same extra-strength material. The one meant to resist the toughest of stains and the roughest of cycles.  The one that can weather the strongest of storms, even when tattered and torn.  Women are designed differently.  We are designed with an emotional strength and mental capacity that surpasses comprehension.  It’s the type of superhuman strength that you don’t even know exists until something happens that forces you to reach down deep inside to tap into it. God put extra reserves in there for us because He knows how much of it we will need as we go through the ebbs and flows of motherhood.

Through all the peaks and all the valleys of our path, there is no greater reward than overcoming life’s obstacles for the sake of our little humans.  Watching them reach each milestone along the way is like adding a new jewel to your crown. Its the crown that only you can see, but still wear so proudly.  Yes, being a mom is extraordinary, and so are we.

As you take a moment to reflect on how many jobs you actually have, I think we can all take a collective sigh and agree that with everything we balance in life, with all the responsibilities, with all the challenges, that

THE JUGGLE IS REAL!

So grab a cup of coffee (or glass of wine), and sit back and relax.  Enjoy the advice, tips, and stories from my own experiences, as well as other moms.  Also read about a dad’s perspective from time to time.  Know that although we lead different lives, at the end of the day, we are all in this together and we are all just working like a motha’.

Super woman